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You Might Be A Redneck If...

Started by holly222,

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holly222

You Might Be A Redneck If...

Your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
Your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
Your momma doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass.
You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
Your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin' dog.
You're an expert on worm beds.
The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.
Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath!"
Your family tree does not fork.
The flood history of the area can be seen on your living room walls.
You haul more than U-Haul.
There is a gun rack on your bicycle.
Your wedding was held in the delivery room.
Your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener.
Your wife's hairdo attracts bees.
Your baby's first words are "Attention K-Mart shoppers."
The antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
Your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
You pick your teeth from a catalog.
You've ever financed a tattoo.
You refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the "day my ship came in."
Your hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
Your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
You've ever barbecued Spam on the grill.
You own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
The best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.
You've ever raked leaves in your kitchen.

Shady Lady

Scary .. a few of them remind me of ME! AcKKKK!  :))

Shady Lady

I guess having hubby remove the transmission from the top of the washing machine so I could do laundry and him putting it smack in the middle of the dinning room table would make me a redneck. If that doesn't qualify me, then the chickens we had as pets that sat on our laps while we watched TV would have to do it.  :))


SexySagittarian



lostinpogoland


Helen

Quote from: Tara on April 25, 2006, 01:30:02 AM


Good one Tara!!! I've been guilty of writing on my hand when there's nothing else available.  :))

hades




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