None Tonight

[gator8_24]

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of
men and women differ so much. And I never have
figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
never figured out why men think with their head and
women with their heart. 

  FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my wife and I
were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to
heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like
it, "I just want you to hold me."
 
  I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
 
  So she says the words that every husband on the
planet dreads to  hear..
"You're just not in touch with my emotional
needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your
physical needs as a man." She responded to my
puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for
who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
 
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that
night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of
work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice
lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed
department store. I walked around with her while she
tried on several very expensive outfits. She
couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd
just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a
pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry
department where she
picked out pair of diamond earrings.
 
Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have
thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I
started to think she was testing me because she
asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even
know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's
fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual
satisfaction from all of the excitement.

  Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said,
"I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

  I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out,
"No honey, I don't feel like it."
 
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw
dropped with a baffled----WHAT?"
 
I then said "honey, I just want you to HOLD this
stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my
financial means as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and
not for the things I buy you?" 
Apparently > I'm not having sex tonight either.

[wattsmyname]

OMG That was just so funny  :)) :))

[nightperson]

omg that was to funny  :))

[jade2002]

 :))

[Luna]

omg that was so funny :)) :))

[hades]

lmao.

[zeboo]

that was too friggin funny  :))

[CindyLouWho]

i've seen that before but been a while, its so darn funny   :))

[Jewel]

lmao

[nightperson]

i have made a copy of this and getting a real good laugh from every1  :)))

[justahumping]

I have seen that before. however, it IS good!... Thanks

[xx_mandy_xx]

 :))) :))

[savanahsmommy]

 :D :))

[david/ross]

  :pp funny :)))friggin  O+O funny   :)) :)) :)) funny