Woman and the silent treatment

[pogo_gamer]

A man and  his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
Other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
He would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting  to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
"Please wake me at 5:00 AM "He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
And he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
See why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
The bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM . Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

   
WIFE VS.  HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and   
Neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, 
The husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied , "in-laws 


WOMEN'S REVENGE

 
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set  in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I  asked.
"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping  with me,
And I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."


 

WORDS

   
A husband read an  article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 
30,000 to a man's  15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have  to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?" 

CREATION

   
A man said to his wife  one day, "I don't know how you can be
So stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.   
" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God  made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be a attracted to you!
 
WHO DOES WHAT


A man and his wife  were having an argument about who
Should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,   
And then we don't have to wait as long  to get our coffee."
The husband  said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and
You should do it, because that is your job, and I can  just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies,  "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible
That the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." 
So she fetched the Bible, and opened  the New Testament
And showed him at the  top of several pages, that it indeed says........."HEBREWS"   

God may have created man before  woman,
But  there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.



 
SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH  AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT

[Darling SilverDodger]

 :)) :)) :)) Very funny.. I loved the one about CREATION

[swamp]

 :))) :))) :))

[Tara]

LMAO..That's some good ones  :D

[Ms.Behavin]

lmao!  :!!

[kandykitty20012]

 :!!