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Is the mind really the first thing to go?

Started by Darling SilverDodger,

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Darling SilverDodger

 woman decides to have a face-lift for her 50th birthday. She spends
$15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.
On her way home, she stops at a newsstand to buy a
newspaper.

Before leaving, she says to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but
how old do you think I am?"

"About 32," is the reply.


"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the
very same question.


The girl replies, "I'd guess about 29."

The woman replies with a big smile, "Nope, I'm 50."

Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on
her way down the street.

She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning
question.

The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30."

Again she proudly responds, "I'm 50, but thank you!"

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to
her the same question.

He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was
young, there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very
forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra.

Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."


They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best
of her. She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead."

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very
slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast gently. He pushes
her breasts together and rubs them against each other.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says,
"Madam, you are 50."

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you
tell?"

The old man says, "Promise you won't get mad?"

"I promise I won't." she says.



"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, rum in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "Holy crap what a ride!"



TmT

lol @ Gamer's sig... Now I use to have biggens (stealin Al Bundy's word) b4 my reduction!!! lol

:D joke  :)))


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