Is It Worth It?

snowflower · June 15, 2009, 10:57:34 AM

Today I have to take my 18 year old Siamese baby to the vet once again. But today is different, I'll be coming home without her this time. I guess this is just one of those hardest things a person has to do in their lifetime ''' there will be others ''' but for me, this one's special. My little dolly has loved me unconditionally, gave me every ounce of love she had asking nothing in return aside from food and a warm place to sleep. She was by my side though happy and sad times, hopeful, disappointing, sorrowful and exciting times. And now this time. This is so very hard. It brings hot burning tears and my heart just aches. Now for one last time, as I achingly look into those still adoring beautiful deep blue eyes I ask myself ''' was it worth it? ''' And my answer is: "If all I have to pay are tears and an ache in my heart for all those irreplacable 18 years of unconditional love, companionship and many, mannny hours of joy and laughter ... then yes, it's worth it. If she were never here, I'd have never known her special kind of love and companionship and when no one else was there to listen, she was. And now I ask myself, how can I get through this? Obvious. I'll just do it all over again ''' there'll be another one (not to replace) yet to bring her own special kind of love to brighten up my world. Just as soon as my heart settles down a little bit. It's worth it.

disneyland lady · June 15, 2009, 11:12:25 AM

(((snowflower)))

I walked this same walk 4 years ago with my 22 yr old siamese and still have not gotten over it. I sometimes feel him jump up on my bed or wrap his body around my legs while I am at the computer. I am just at the point where I really miss the companionship but still understand that I will have to let go sometime and I am not there yet. I feel so bad for you but your dear friend is in the better place. My advice is to go thru the house today and take the water bowl and everything out because time does not make that part any easier. Hang in there and come here when you need companionship. We are not as fuzzy but most of us are without fleas.

Squid · June 15, 2009, 11:24:57 AM

(((((((((((Sun)))))))))))))

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I've gone down that road many times - dogs and cats. Know that when you come here to the forum you are with empathetic friends. I wish I could do more to ease your pain. May your baby rest in peace. I'm an animal lover and I will say the same as you do - IT'S WORTH IT!

Quote from: disneyland lady on June 15, 2009, 11:12:25 AM
most of us are without fleas.

Speak for yourself.

Stinkerbell · June 15, 2009, 11:44:05 AM

I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I had to take my four year old Boxer and have her released from her suffering. She had a brain tumor and we couldn't afford the thousands and thousands of dollars worth of treatment that it would have taken to save her. That killed me, putting a price on her life...I felt like I had betrayed her love and trust.

I held her while they gave her the injection, then sat holding her while she went to sleep, then laid on the floor with her for a long time after she was gone. The vet kept checking on me, but never told me I needed to leave. She gave me all the time I needed there with my baby. It hasn't gotten easier...even now I am sitting here crying. I will never get over it, never forgive myself for not having the money to give her a chance. For a long time I thought that maybe I didn't deserve to be a pet owner if I couldn't do more for them when they needed it, ya know? Anyway... If I had allowed her to live, it would have been for purely selfish reasons...because I didn't want to lose her. I had to make the decision that my grief was not as important as her comfort. Anyway...

Many of us have been where you are, you're not alone...we understand and share your sorrow. We remember and mourn with you.

jarjar · June 15, 2009, 12:37:01 PM

Snowflower. This is a heartbreaking road to travel. Myself I have been there. God Bless you sweetie.

Homer · June 15, 2009, 02:01:57 PM

Sorry for your loss

I think I would have to go right to the shelter and get me another friend.

C~M · June 15, 2009, 03:04:25 PM

I had to have my mutt of 16 years put down a few years ago and it was hard, but had no choice as all he did was cry in pain. He was blind, deaf, and had a big cancer on his gums.

It took less than a year until I had me new baby.

My your friend understand why you did it snow, and rest in peace until you meet again.

swamp · June 15, 2009, 03:06:05 PM

so sorry for your loss

snowflower · June 15, 2009, 03:50:25 PM

Well, I am back from the vet and I have to tell you, you've all made it so much easier ''' I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your comments of testimonies and comfort, it really helps! If ever I told any one right person or group of people ... they are all right here in this forum. She went to sleep very peacefully, we wrapped her in her old familiar blanket and put her and her toys in the "box" my hubby made for her. With sad hearts we buried her under the apple tree (which is now, ironically, in full bloom). I will visit her often and sit and talk with her just as I always did. And as always, she'll be there for me.

CrazyMan, I know that must've been so hard for you, bless you ''' but you did the right thing, now you have a new friend to fill your days and so does he. It seems to be the only right thing to do ''' why waste any love ... there's not enuf in this world as it is. Homer, Swamp and JarJar, ty for your sympathies ''' until you go there, it's hard to imagine how much it helps.

Stinkerbell, that must've been so hearbreaking for you ''' but you know, you did the very best thing you could do under the circumstances and I'm extremely proud of your strength to make that decision, stick with it and see it through. I don't know how I'd have fared out in your shoes, I'm afraid I would have stumbled terribly. Blessings, you are such a good person!

And Squid and Disney, thank you for your kind words of comfort ''' and I was right ... I DID come to the right place, you are all just so great. Imagine I'd find this comfort right here in the forum '''' when the man down the road said: "but it's just a CAT!" Thank you FRIENDS!!

~Sassy~ · June 15, 2009, 04:00:12 PM

Snowflower,
That is the worst time for any pet lover. I have had to put a pet down a couple of times and it is never easy. They give unconditional love and stay beside us always, they don't care what we look like, don't care what kind of car we drive. They just want to be with us and be loved in return. I am a true animal lover. Squid has the cutest little dog, I had one like Squid's, her name was Sasha and I will always love her.
You brought her back home to the place she knew and loved. May angels watch over you.
So very sorry.
Hugs,
Sassy

snowflower · June 15, 2009, 04:08:55 PM

Ohhhh Bless you Sassy, I'm sorry for your loss too and everyone elses in here. My hubby and I are just amazed at the love in this forum!! Thank you for your reply and words of comfort. Bless you one and all!

Stinkerbell · June 15, 2009, 05:01:49 PM

Quote from: snowflower on June 15, 2009, 03:50:25 PM
Stinkerbell, that must've been so hearbreaking for you ''' but you know, you did the very best thing you could do under the circumstances and I'm extremely proud of your strength to make that decision, stick with it and see it through. I don't know how I'd have fared out in your shoes, I'm afraid I would have stumbled terribly. Blessings, you are such a good person!

Thank you so much. I couldn't bring myself to just leave her there alone on top of the rest of the betrayal I felt I was heaping on her.

But for you, I know how hard it is for you. You're in all our thoughts and prayers.

Squid · June 15, 2009, 05:08:18 PM

I keep crying when I come to this thread... for good reason. Losing a beloved pet is one of the worst things in life. I guess that makes appreciating them while they're here all the more important. Animals can really bring a joy to life that non-animal people can never understand. You're in my thoughts and prayers, snow (hubby, too!)

jarjar · June 15, 2009, 06:20:21 PM

I know that trip was hard on you Snow. You have done what is best for your loved friend.
We still have four dogs and two cats. Had to let two cats and one dog go to Rainbow Bridge in the past two years. Believe you me it is taking a toll on the hubby and I.
Sad to say I have two right now up in age and not looking their best. The vet checked them out this weekend and said they are still not in any pain that he can tell. We know it is a matter of time and we really do not want to see those days come.
I am a people person online but in real life it is me my hubby and our pups and cats. Not counting the guinia pig and the turtle...lol
We live with our animals they do not live with us. And we love and cherish every moment.
I have learned to put blinders on when on the streets. Hubby and I both tend to want to pick the strays up and give them a home. We talk about how it is time to stop. We are not getting any younger and do not want to go before our babies. And yes I have three real live children that have left the nest. So these are our babies now.
God Bless you sweetie. I know it was a very hard day for you. Just remember there are many animals at the shelter that need a home and love. And you could just be the one to save one.

harley89 · June 15, 2009, 06:37:24 PM

There is a hill that overlooks my house. When I need to think I go there. That is where Booger, Sheba and BooBoo sleep they were my friends and family for many years

snowflower · June 15, 2009, 07:22:39 PM

Thank you again everyone ''' this thread (at least for today) is my solace and consolation (and hubbys). Most of you have been there and done this too and I can sympathize with each and every one. We all feel so helpless at times like these! But in the end, we manage to do the right thing, take time to heal ourselves - and then move on. ''' Thanks for being here, you're all just the GREATEST!

Hocky · June 15, 2009, 09:04:18 PM

I am so sorry to hear about your loss Snow. I just got a 6 month old puppy 2 weeks ago....havent owned a dog in 15 yrs. In this short period of time he has captured my heart and I would be very sad if I had to let him go even this soon.

Please know that you have many friends here and we all support each other in good and bad times. I am sure your beloved pet is safe and comfortable now and is looking down on you giving you big kitty kisses and rubs.

snowflower · June 15, 2009, 10:26:46 PM

Quote from: hocky on June 15, 2009, 09:04:18 PM
I am so sorry to hear about your loss Snow. I just got a 6 month old puppy 2 weeks ago....havent owned a dog in 15 yrs. In this short period of time he has captured my heart and I would be very sad if I had to let him go even this soon.

Please know that you have many friends here and we all support each other in good and bad times. I am sure your beloved pet is safe and comfortable now and is looking down on you giving you big kitty kisses and rubs.

hockey dear, everything you say is true and I, among many, many others, are grateful for this forum and everybody in it. Enjoy with random the here and now with your sweet

. I n good times to come you will be surprised to discover the wonderful rewards so easily earned. They are angels ''' each and every one. I feel my dolly's presence and know I've done the right thing ... she is with me still.

Is It Worth It?

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