How should I handle this?

[roadwarrior]

I take a swimming aerobics class at the Y.

Twice a week for 45 minutes.

The aquatics director told me on my way out of the Y on Thursday morning that a couple people have complained I've said some inappropriate things during class.

When I asked what I supposedly said that has upset my classmates, she said she didn't know what I said, other than I said some inappropriate things.

I've been racking my brain. I know I haven't made fun of anyone in class-I'm fat, cubby and out of shape and look horrible in a bathing suite so I really have no room to talk.

I have no idea who complained about me so I can't ask them about what I said so I don't do or say whatever I did to upset them again.

I'm not mad at whoever complained, I just wanna know what things I've said that were "inappropriate" so I can apologize and not bring that up/do that up anymore.

I know it can't be the language I use as I'm careful not to say hell, dam or other curse words.  I curse like a sailor outside of class but knowing this is the Y and some people may not like those kinds of words I'm super careful.

During class everyone talks about everything from kids to day care issues, money issues, health problems, politics-nothing in depth, just I don't like so and so and we're all screwed and what church they go to/recent church activities-no beliefs talked about by myself or anyone, it's limited to hey *insert church name* is having a x social event at x time/date if anyone wants to come.

So I have no idea what I said, no idea what I'm not supposed to do anymore other than I upset a couple people (no idea if it was one person or half the class) by saying a couple inappropriate things.

What do I do from here? Do I stop going to the class and find something else? Do I go back doing what I have been doing all along hoping some one will tell me? Do I ask the class what I said? I doubt they will tell me anyway considering they didn't tell me to begin with.

[hotpinklovesofa]

Don't worry about it.  Seriously, don't let it get to you.  If you know that you're not doing or saying anything inappropriate then there's absolutely no reason for you to stop going to class or change anything about the way you handle yourself.  If the instructor can't or won't say what exactly constitutes inappropriate behavior on your part then she might as well have said nothing at all to you. Either come up with something concrete or tell you who has the problem so you can speak to them directly otherwise it didn't actually happen.  If someone has a problem with you but doesn't have the ovaries to admit what it is or who they are then they can be the ones to remove themselves from the class if they continue to be 'offended.'

[roadwarrior]

The only thing I can think of is my constant chattering.  I'm a chattery person by nature.  I can talk on and on about anything and everything.  Sometimes I do talk to much and it can bother other people but if/when someone tells me/says to me "hey, pipe down!" I realize I've been chattering away too much, apologize and quite down.

But nobody in class has said anything along the lines of "I know you love to talk but sometimes your constant chattering makes it hard to concentrate."

My reaction will be along the lines of  "Oh crap, I'm sorry.  I didn't realize I was bothering you."  From then on out I'll be careful about how much I say during class. 

It's just been bugging the heck out of me.  I know sometimes I can say or do things that I don't think is offense but somebody else does.  Heck, I'm dam sure we've all done that.

[hotpinklovesofa]

Being a Chatty Cathy isn't inappropriate, annoying maybe but not inappropriate nor worthy of the director hiding it from you unless she truly doesn't know what the real issue is.  If you go in and behave the way you normally do then the person who complained before will be forced to complain again or leave if they continue to have an issue.  If she wants to continue to complain and the director pulls you aside yet again just tell her that without hearing specifics that you can't apologize nor modify your behavior so you're just going to have to assume that it's something personal, in which case they can remove themselves from the class.  You have the right to know who your accuser is and exactly what you've allegedly done wrong if you're going to be called out on exhibiting inappropriate behavior by the instructor.

[hotpinklovesofa]

Push back until you figure out who's been pushing you.  The fact that no specifics were ever given makes it all look very sketchy so I wouldn't trust that it's an issue with you but more of an issue with them.  Stand strong.

[roadwarrior]

thanks for the advice.  I don't even care who the accuser is....I just want to know what I'm doing wrong so I can change it.  It's just frustrating.

I've had something like this happen to me before in the past, where I supposedly did something inappropriate or several things inappropriate but nobody would tell me what I was doing wrong so I could stop/change it.

Other than being frustrated about it, I'm just going to have to let it go and take your suggestions.

[Homer]

thanks for the advice.  I don't even care who the accuser is....I just want to know what I'm doing wrong so I can change it.  It's just frustrating.

I've had something like this happen to me before in the past, where I supposedly did something inappropriate or several things inappropriate but nobody would tell me what I was doing wrong so I could stop/change it.

Other than being frustrated about it, I'm just going to have to let it go and take your suggestions.

Did you pee in the pool? 

[gran2x2]

>>>>@ PEE IN THE POOL!!!

[roadwarrior]

Did you pee in the pool? 

ssshhh you gave away my secret! LOL 

according to CDC one in 5 pee in the pool and one in 7 don't shower before getting in.

[Squid]

Regarding the pee.... RW can now count herself among Olympians!  What's his name admitted he pees in the pools.  ROFL

I think the aerobics director is an idiot for even approaching you without the info and specifics.  Maybe no one complained and the director just doesn't want you chatting it up.  I would not worry about and would continue taking the classes.  If there is an issue lurking in the pool among your fellow aerobicizers, it will eventually surface for a breath of air and you can deal with it. 

Please post pics of you and the gals at the Y!  Homer likes boobies.   

[Homer]

I would hold three fingers up and tell them to read between the lines